I've been experiencing this for about 2 years now, and it's just been getting worse.  Whenever I try to play with my friends on Xbox or ps4, the game will randomly make me disconnect from the server or disconnect if I tab out, and then they will have to either reset their world or the entire game for me to join back.  The same issue happens when I host, but all players will disconnect only if I tab out.  This gets extremely annoying, and recently it's gotten really bad to the point where I can't even play with my friends anymore, and the game is also just super laggy, even though both of our internets are fine.  Heres a video of what happens: https://youtu.be/Tw58yATwOJc